Saturday, May 16, 2009

We Need to Get Past Ourselves.....

Spare me!!! Spare me the bullshit please!! I scream it to the rooftops! Spare me the lying, the cheating, the lack or morals, the bullshit I or anybody reading this has encountered!!!
We live in a society today that has a severe problem when it comes to staying together. Just this week alone two of my closest friends are going through break-ups. One is ending a two-year relationship and one is getting divorced. My friend that is getting divorced told me straight up…..”JON, DON’T GET MARRIED!!” I was like damn, for real! I couldn’t believe it. I know at least two women that by the end of the year that will be divorced or legally separated. In 2006 I was hanging out with a lot of couples real heavy due to the fact that I was in a relationship myself. Two of those couples are still together and their married, but those of us that were in relationships aren’t anymore and you can add a divorce to those statistics as well along with my own relationship in that group of people.

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH US!!! Oh my God I wish I knew the be all, end all answer to maintaining a relationship, but I don’t. In no way am I the expert. I’m simply learning my way as you are, but I choose to write about these trials and tribulations instead of holding them in.

I don’t have the answers, but I have questions and I have my view of how things could be handled, but that’s it. So what exactly do I think, well…..

We as men and women towards men and women need to learn to get past ourselves in order for our relationships and marriages to work. We have become an independent, but selfish generation. Everything is all about us! Everybody is doing them! Oh, I get so sick of that saying, Do you! When your single is when you do you, but the fucking problem is people need to understand when your involved with another person that do you shit ends!! I just lost a reader just that quick. If I did your probably selfish and self-centered!

Real talk everybody, we need to learn to work together as a unit when we are in committed, serious relationships. We need to hold ourselves accountable for shit and stop always pointing the finger and check ourselves! If she did this, if he did this, if she would change this, if he would change that!! SHUT UP!!! You know exactly who he or she was before you got with them, said you loved them, or married them. Nobody changes anything about themselves unless they want to, not because we love them so much, at least most of the time.

I’ll be the first to say that I love strong independent women, hell I was raised by one, but when I man looks for a woman were trying to see where we can fit in, can we afford you, and most importantly does she really want a relationship if that’s what that man is looking for, at least I do.

We have to know where we fit in and just so you ladies don’t get it twisted, we have to fit in on a level that is more than physical. Period!!

When I’m writing I’m hard on guys! Oh, I tear us apart because there are so many bad seeds that fuck it up for the good guys (like myself). From these so called men that aren’t taking care of their kids , to men who are just on the hunt and conquest, to men that are just out to hurt other peoples relationships.

As men we need to step our game up. We need to take these good woman seriously and stop playing games. A good woman may be hard to find just as a good man is hard to find for women, but with all the bad out in the world a good man or woman shouldn’t be that hard to spot, though sometime it is due to all the bullshit we encounter everyday.

I bet there’s not a man or woman reading this that wish we had our histories, and or credit reports stamped on are backs. LOL! The crazy thing is that wouldn’t make things any easier. Relationships are always hard, but the benefits are wonderful.

We have to learn to communicate, understand, listen, and most importantly push aside our pride in order for any relationship to work. There nothing cool about fronting on man or woman we say that we love. Please, lets me honest with each other, support each other and even though it’s hard, try to understand where the other person is coming from. The most important thing is we have to try! People don’t try anymore! We think they try, but they haven’t. We think if we move on to other people that things will be easier, but that concept is wrong. We think that if we leave that were saving ourselves. Don’t get me wrong because if you’re in a bad situation then that’s true, but if you’re not, then it’s simply a cop out. We need to try to harder!!

We will never understand each other or learn to be a unbreakable, strong, and happy bond until we learn to get past ourselves. That doesn’t mean lose yourself, but get past yourself. Use what you have to bring to the table to make the bond stronger, period! That’s my take, what’s yours?

God Bless,
“13 Ways” (The Movement)

This blog is copyrighted by The Movement Expressed Writings Inc. 2009

2 comments:

  1. I completely agree with you. We do have to get past ourselves and learn to work together when it comes to relationships. It takes a lot of hard work and willingness to committ to make relationships work. And even when your married, those vows mean something...for better or worse. People tend to love the better, but when the worse comes along, people want to run. Relationships aren't meant to be easy...anything successful is never easy to obtain.

    I enjoyed your post as usual. Great job Mr. Woods. God Bless.

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  2. I truly enjoyed reading this post. There aren't alot of people out there anymore that are willing to try! When the going gets tough, the tough get going. People need to learn to stick it out. I completely agree with your post.
    Thanks J. Woods

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